One BedRoom Flat...

This one has been doing the rounds these days in the latest IT tradition of forwards. Its worth sharing with the rest of teh literary population...

As the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in
Software Engineering and joined a company based in USA, the
land of braves and opportunity. When I arrived in the USA, it
was as if a dream had come true.


Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I
would be staying in this country for about Five years in which
time I would have earned enough money to settle down in India.

My father was a government employee and after his retirement,
the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat.


I wanted to do some thing more than him. I started feeling
homesick and lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and
speak to my parents every week using cheap international phone
cards. Two years passed, two years of Burgers at McDonald's and
pizzas and discos and 2 years watching the foreign exchange
rate getting happy whenever the Rupee value went down.

Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have
only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within
these 10 days. I got my ticket booked in the cheapest flight.
Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for
all my friends back home. If I miss anyone then there will be
talks. After reaching home I spent home one week going through
all the photographs of girls and as the time was getting
shorter I was forced to select one candidate.


In-laws told me, to my surprise, that I would have to get
married in 2-3 days, as I will not get anymore holidays. After
the marriage, it was time to return to USA, after giving some
money to my parents and telling the neighbors to look after
them, we returned to USA.


My wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she
started feeling lonely. The frequency of calling India
increased to twice in a week sometimes 3 times a week. Our
savings started diminishing.

After two more years we started to
have kids. Two lovely kids, a boy and a girl, were gifted to us
by the almighty. Every time I spoke to my parents, they asked
me to come to Indiaso that they can see their grand-children.


Every year I decide to go to India… But part work part
monetary conditions prevented it. Years went by and visiting
Indiawas a distant dream. Then suddenly one day I got a
message that my parents were seriously sick. I tried but I
couldn't get any holidays and thus could not go to India ... The
next message I got was my parents had passed away and as there
was no one to do the last rights the society members had done
whatever they could. I was depressed. My parents had passed
away without seeing their grand children.


After couple more years passed away, much to my children's
dislike and my wife's joy we returned to Indiato settle down.
I started to look for a suitable property, but to my dismay my
savings were short and the property prices had gone up during
all these years. I had to return to the USA...


My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to
stay in India... My 2 children and I returned to USAafter
promising my wife I would be back for good after two years.

Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an
American and my son was happy living in USA... I decided that
had enough and wound-up every thing and returned to India... I
had just enough money to buy a decent 02 bedroom flat in a
well-developed locality.


Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the flat is
for the routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife
has also left me and gone to the holy abode.

Sometimes

I wondered was it worth all this?

My father, even after staying in India,

Had a house to his name and I too have
the same nothing more.

I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.

Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing.
This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these
children are losing their values and culture because of it. I
get occasional cards from my children asking I am alright. Well
at least they remember me.


Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbors again who will
be performing my last rights, God Bless them.

But the question
still
remains 'was all this worth it?'

I am still searching for an answer.................!!!

START THINKING

IS IT JUST FOR ONE EXTRA BEDROOM???

LIFE IS BEYOND THIS …..DON’T JUST LEAVE YOUR LIFE ……..
START LIVING IT …….
LIVE ITAS YOU WANT IT TO BE …….

Confessions of a confused mind!!!

I always thought that My blog lacked the exquisite feminine touch, so in the spirit of making it come a full circle my very dear and close friend has contributed the following post to my space. I am sure this in so many ways will relate to each one of you out there at very individual level and probably let you know that we all are going through the same thing...

An ode to her...


‘Confused’ that very word which turns our life upside down when we least expect it to. Just when you think life’s going great, its going absolutely in the right direction …boom your reverie is broken and there you are, standing on cross roads, and the world is waiting for you to take that crucial decision, which will supposedly alter your life one way or the other. Things which seemed so simple from a third person’s perspective just suddenly start seeming so unfathomable. Both the roads seem equally tempting but also you need to choose one. And not just take that road out; also be willing to shoulder the responsibility which comes with following the path. Right or Wrong? Easy or difficult? Challenging or smooth sailing?......These and many more variables keep floating in the air and there are no clear answers to the same.

Because my dear friend, the bitch part about life is that its just way too unpredictable, and there are no guarantees, and well reality most always sucks. Yeah I know skeptic in me surfaces again, but hey, what’s life if not a road full of six lanes stretches interspersed with potholes!! So well you sail through some, and through some patches you have a bumpy ride. But the deeper question here is; what do you do when both the roads seem equally balanced on the scale, which do you consider as the lesser evil. The thing is if one option is where you see an easy life with less complications, and maybe a little less exciting, and the other is full of high octane action where happiness is not a guarantee, u need to fight your way through and try and live each and every dream you had, but you may end up alone; in that case which one do you choose. Should you give up all that you always dreamt of and wanted and take the practical and sensible road out or do you gather enough courage and say that this is your life and you will live it the way you want.

Different people, different opinions, and, different ways of dealing with life. Is having the ‘What if’ question at the fag end of your life really of that much importance, is it really linked to regret. I mean you have actually completed your life, whatever there was to it, happy or sad you have lived it, and then in the last 2-3 yrs if you do reflect back and think ‘what if’, then does it really even matter. We have one life and the choices we make define us and shape our existence in this world. Good or bad the decisions we make stay with us and we have to live with them. There is no way of knowing where the choice you are making is going to take you. You just take that decision and pray to god that you don’t end up in hell yet again !!

I really envy those people picture postcard happy people, how their life seems to be bereft of any complications as such, or is it really? Or maybe even they are living under a façade of happiness, a giant marquee where everyone is pretending to be happier than the other. After all in the game of life you most definitely don’t want to end up as the biggest looser. Lets be honest, a little part in all of us wants to be the toast of the world, to be envied by all around, to be looked up at as a role model, and hey lets face it we all want to be cooler than the next living thing. So, that’s where this offspring of the devil, ‘Confusion’ comes in. Murphy’s law rules this world, the minute you would take the seemingly right path, kaboom the very next instant you wish you would taken the other one. It’s a vicious circle, I tell you, and one from which you probably never get out of, until of-course if you would have attained nirvana, and reached another level and all. But most of us have only one level, and that’s what screams – ‘hey you need to win the race of life’. And its not all centered around money, of course you want a cool paying high flying job and all, but you also in addition want a happy family life, the one Hollywood summer flicks are made of, the ones which make your heart cry out loud that – Yes! I want a family/ hubby / children like that.

Alas, reality isn’t always so sunny and bright, its more ‘American beauty’ and ‘little miss sunshine’ clubbed together than anything else. So well yeah, coming back, which is better- a glamorous high flying cool dude, or a simple hearted soul with a zest and will to live life. With one life will be glitz and yeah classy, with the other it will be less pressure and easy and fun, where you will build things together. So which ones right and which one’s wrong, no right answers there my friend. The decision of who you are going to spend the rest of your life with is a crucial one, high impact and all. So how does one decide that its time to call it quits and settle down. That this is the right one, I understand the ‘in love’ funda, but well what happens when its arranged. Do you actually know if you will ever be able to madly and passionately fall in love with that person, or will it be a matter of slowly growing fond since you are living with each other. And then is it actually fair to do this to another person. To think of it why should someone else be responsible for carrying your excess emotional baggage. He or she deserves and rightly so to be with a person who values and respects them, not with someone who is pretending to be happy with them. Ah! Well confusion again.

Why is it so scary to take the final plunge? Does life actually undergo so much change, maybe yes maybe no. Depends on which way you look at it. When we are growing up we always dream of a perfect life, a perfect wedding, a perfect husband, the perfect romance to sail us through, but then we grow up, and things are not so perfect anymore. Your list of ‘I defiantly want this in a guy /girl’ keeps reducing as the years keep adding on. You suddenly start getting that slight scary feeling that what if you do end up all alone. You feel that slight tinge of envy for people who are able to find their soulmates. You start telling yourself the merits of an arranged marriage setup, although when u were growing up, you wanted your perfect guy to come into your life sweep you off your feet and take you away. You never thought marriage is going to be objective and analytical, wherein you decide on the eligibility of a person almost as if you are shopping for them. It just doesn’t seem right to you, conflicts with your ideals and emotions, but also you know there is no other option. You feel scared that what if it never happens to you, that what if believing in your dreams lead you nowhere, and Mr. Right never turned up!!

It’s scary, but then is being scared a good enough reason to get married. Is it fair to the other person. Are you doing this because you couldn’t find anyone on your own, and given a chance this is not how you would want it to happen? But hey life is all about tough choices, we all need to go through it. So you tell yourself, grab this before this also goes, and you are left with none, but isn’t that a little selfish. Then again if you wont think of your own good then who else will. Life is like a box of chocolates, Forrest Gump said, you never know what you may end up with !! So moral of the story: go out there and take the chance, because that’s what life is all about.

P.S- dedicated to the complicated woman of today  ME !!

Prespectives and Choices...

It’s been quite a long time that I have penned down my thoughts, and just like a very normal modern day cosmo chum, am gonna blame it all on my work and busy life. Well to write this post has got quite a different motivation in itself and this by all means breaks all standards and tone of my blog. Ain’t feeling that rebellious today and with my head filled with so many questions and priorities to which empty blank space seems to have lost all the answers, I here attempt to deal with one. The other complicated stuff, some other time perhaps.

This smoke got its spark from yesterday night’s pre marriage party, won’t say a bachelor party cos nothing of the sort happened for one of my room mates. These guys have been in a relationship for almost a decade now and guess what its just confidence and faith that pulled them through. You guys know what I am talking about right??? Guy’s folks say No, Gal’s folks say No…they decide it has to be them or no one…gave themselves 1 year of time for the parents to sink this in and after 1.5 years of courtship they finally tie the knot with both families consent. And so has been the start of many many fabulous happy life stories…The second kick to this was when I finally decided to complete my Orkut profile and got stuck at the question of “About me”… this started the chain of thoughts as to the primitive essence of our existence and its necessity.

At its most basic and fundamental level, there is no “purpose" to existence beyond the simple, sufficient and magnificent manifestation of Reality, as it is. In this sense, the "purpose" of our existence is simply to release our resistance to our experience as it manifests within the present moment. It is this process of letting go that allows us to fully appreciate and accept Reality, as it is here and now, with a full recognition that:

In my experience, "purpose" and "meaning" do not exist as a means to some other external end. They are inherent within the nature of Reality, itself -- exactly as it is. Reality needs no reason or purpose to justify its existence. It is innately satisfying, self-sufficient, and self-fulfilled.
It is only within the relative, thinking mind that we believe things must have some reason or purpose to exist, above and beyond their own innate Presence. With the experience of Awakening, this need to justify the existence of Reality falls away. It is experienced as completely and innately self-sufficient.

Awakening to the essential of Reality involves recognizing that nothing requires another
point of reference to justify its existence. In fact, some have described the nature and purpose of existence as consciousness discovering itself. Within this context, it may be helpful to understand the "purpose" of our existence, both yours and mine, as an expression and celebration of this infinite unfolding and discovery. In this sense, the entire purpose of manifest existence is simply to facilitate the realization of who and what
you really are. There is nothing more or other.

I believe we define ourselves by the choices we make at each step and no choice is easy to make and the only constant factor in the whole giant saga\fiasco we call life is that no choice is right or wrong. And in the end its all we have to live with so the only motivating factor which makes any sense is self happiness cos, happiness is always the strongest propogative force, and it always makes your closed ones happy when you are happy…. Having that said I believe its my time to put my pen down. The sun is almost about to set in my home country and very soon this country will see its first ray of sunshine for the day… till next time peace to all, and a smile to every face on this planet…